Sorry I’ve been missing in action for a while, I was embroiled in a legal battle with Warner Brothers Entertainment.

That’s not an exaggeration. Remember how I got banned from YouTube for uploading that 4K upscale of Urgh!?

Yeah? Remember how I said getting banned didn’t really bother me that much?

Yo, I lied.

It’s a whole thing. I created a Medium account specifically to write about it. I suggest you go read that for the details. I posted it on Medium because I figured more people would read it if I linked to a service like that instead of my own blog, and I’m pretty sure I was right. That’ll probably be the most read thing I write all year, by a longshot.

Here’s the thing; no one reads this site anymore. When this site was in its prime, I would say from 2006 to 2010, I was averaging literally thousands of visitors a day. I think I broke 10,000 in one day when I got Fark’d (ah, I miss Web 2.0 websites).

I’m lucky if I break 100 a day now.

I don’t think that Lost Turntable is going to be around much longer in its current state. I’m sorry.

I’m simply finding it harder and harder to make the time to do this. I still love writing about music, it’s just that it’s hard to find music that is I both like and is out-of-print. And I typically don’t feel like putting forth the time and effort needed to give those releases their just due, simply because no one is going to read whatever I write about them! And that’s not a slam on my writing or whatever, it’s just a fact that not many people care about weird French prog or avant-garde Japanese electronic music. I mean, duh.

Also, this shit with Warner Bros. scared me. They could have sued me hadn’t they also released Urgh! illegally (seriously, read that Medium post). Every time I post something here I theoretically run that risk. I sure as hell am never posting anything by a major artist ever again, it’s too risky.

Finally, and on a completely other topic, I just feel like I should be doing something else with my time. This feeling has been nagging at me for a while now, but it really went into overdrive after my dad passed away earlier this year. When I was at his memorial service, so many people came up to me and told me how much he meant to them, how he changed their lives, and how they felt he helped so many people around him. My dad was a businessman, I am very much not a businessman. That’s not my place in the world. But, when my time comes I really don’t want my legacy to be “hey, he was that dude who posted that Hulk Hogan album.” I would like to contribute something with a bit more substance than ironic copyright infringement.

So now what?

Yeah, that’s a good question.

Well, for the immediate future, probably at least until the end of the year, I’ll continue to update this blog on occasion, definitely at least once a month if not more. I got some genuinely obscure stuff that i want to share. And it’s all so far out there that I feel safe doing it. After that, I think I’ll finally redesign this sucker, merge it with Mostly-Retro, and turn it more into a general blog/website where I can share a wider variety of writing. And I might still share the occasional out-of-print song, if it’s obscure and weird enough, you never know. Even I don’t, I couldn’t stop writing about music if my life depended on it, so I’ll still be doing that in some capacity on this site no matter what. If that fails to find an audience, so be it, but at least I’ll be doing something I like to do.

Concurrently, however, I do plan on posting actual original content on my YouTube page. That’s one of the reasons that I fought so hard to get it back. I want to post videos about rare records, Japanese record stores, and more. I think that’ll be more interesting to more people than an old blog with music from some Italian disco no one has ever heard of.

And of course, there’s my podcast, Cinema Oblivia. That is still going strong! I’ve had to cut it back to a bi-weekly schedule for time being, but I genuinely enjoy doing that. It hasn’t exactly found an audience as of yet, but I’m not giving up on it anytime soon, it’s way too fun.

Honestly though, it would be great if one of those things got popular enough for me to monetize it in some way, just enough to qualify as a part time job, nothing major. It would mean so much for my mental well-being. On thing the pandemic has taught me is that businesses don’t give A FUCK about their workers. And I’m sick and tired of being treated as expendable as the crew of the Nostromo. If I could create something that would give me a bit more freedom it would be great.

If you’re a longtime fan of my blog and you want to help me out, share my videos and podcasts when I put them up. Spread the word. Hey, I love the 75-125 of your who visit my site every few days, but I need more than yinz to get by these days.

In the meantime, here’s some Italian disco no one has ever heard of.

Giants
Backdoor Man
Hollywood Queen
I very rarely buy albums because of the cover these days, but damn, that cover. Luckily, the record is really good too. Well, maybe “really good” isn’t the right phrase. “Really damn weird” and “a little fucked up” are probably more accurate ways to describe the magic and the mystery of Giants, who only released two album in the late-70s and early-80s before taking off the helmets and shoulder pads.

They certainly have an image, the football player from hell is a look, that’s for sure. If the Italian Wikipedia page is right, they named themselves after the American football team of the same name, and the look followed. Whatever the reason may be, I dig the hell out of it. They’re like Daft Punk’s evil fratboy cousins, but cool.

Giants was mostly the work of two dudes, Daniele Baima Besquet and Ronnie Jackson. I think the project was his baby. He’s the producer and the co-writer for every song, while Jackson just serves as the album’s other writer. Bequet seemed to have a decent career behind the scenes through the 70s and 80s. He worked with Libra, the prog rock act that was on Motown Records (okay then) and also worked with Nikka Costa on her first album. And I mean her actual first album, she was nine when it came out. Ronnie Jackson mostly worked as a writer, working with Besquet on that early Costa album and for a few Italian singers as well.

Synth pioneer Michael Boddicker is also a couple of tracks on this album, but he’s relegated to “guest” credit. I’m sure he doesn’t mind. He has a Grammy after all.

And all this is fine and good but whatever, I’m not posting these tracks because of who worked on them, or because of the album’s absolutely insane cover. I’m posting them because “Hollywood Queen” is a pretty good song, and because “Backdoor Man” is one of the craziest pop songs I’ve ever heard.

If you think you’ve guessed what “Backdoor Man” is by the title, congrats you’re right! But never has a double entendre been less of a double entendre than “Backdoor Man.” It makes ZZ Top’s “Pearl Necklace” Ovid by comparison. Once your song about an illicit sex act references lubrication, it’s no longer a metaphor, it’s just about the thing. And trust me, the line about lube is not the most depraved or bizarre in this song. I’m not going to write what those are, my mom still reads this blog, you’ll just have to download and listen to the track yourself.

I SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE THE CHORUS OF THIS SONG. IT’S SO DIRTY I DON’T WANT TO TYPE IT. BUT I LOVE IT. I ALMOST SANG IT ALOUD AT WORK HELP ME.

As for “Hollywood Queen,” it’s much more tame lyrically, even with its clear references to whiskey and cocaine. It’s just a great tune. It has the sequences and synths of “I Feel Love” but with a clear hard rock sound over top it. It’s like Giorgrio Moroder meets Van Halen. It reminds me of Macho’s cover of “I’m a Man.” Only slightly less gay. Slightly.

Look, I don’t care who that back-up singers in “Backdoor Man” are women. I don’t care that he explicitly mentions women in the opening verse. I do not believe for one second that the door in question belongs to a woman’s, ahem, home.

Thanks for the support everyone. Stay tuned for more news about the future of this site, and more weird old music from Europe.

 

 

 

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